Skillfully handle trigger situations (AND watch your business boom)

Man versus woman.

We all face moments of exasperation; as a business coach I have learned how to cope with trigger situations and wish to share what can be done to enable you to get motivated and look past these set backs in order to achieve your goals.


I recently experienced powerful feelings of anger and sadness in response to the way I was treated by someone at work. Even though I was in the midst of these emotions, and in TA terms* in my child ego state, the adult part of me was able to see that my response was highly emotional and that I was being “triggered”.


Later I role-played with one of my colleagues using bodywork.   I moved into the body posture of the “wronged” person. My colleague, playing the person who had triggered my response, now massaged my shoulders, hugged me, and together we walked around the room hand in hand. After only a couple of minutes, having experience a “corrective emotional and physical experience”, I was at peace with the incident.


If you find yourself having a strong emotional reaction to someone’s behaviour, there are many actions you can take in the moment:


  • Imagine you are the other person, and see things from their perspective
  • Send love to yourself and to the other person
  • Say to yourself “trust the grand design”
  • Welcome your feelings and metaphorically speaking, find ways to “hold” your hurt self
  • Simply breathe with long slow breaths
  • There are also actions you can take later:
  • Find ways to treat yourself well
  • Forgive yourself and the other person via a “letter that never gets sent”
  • Be open to the gifts that can follow this experience
  • Seek out healing, counseling, coaching and/or body work.


*TA is a psychological model of human behaviour.


How do you deal with trigger situations at work? Share your tips.

This article was written by Karen Skehel